"Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please." (Mark Twain)

Thursday, December 01, 2005

Republican Family Values - If You Value Your Family, Avoid Republicans 

Didja ever notice how much National Review columnist - and solidly mainstream conservative pundit - John Derbyshire resembles a child molester?
National Review's John Derbyshire

Of course, it would be irresponsible and even slanderous to make such a comparison - except that Derbyshire freely admits to having the soul of a kiddy diddler! Here he is, in his own words, at The Corner (via TAPPED, emphasis supplied):
Conservatives, as I recall, are the ones who believe that "human nature has no history." It follows that we are at ease with the fact that the human female is visually attractive to the human male at, or shortly after, puberty, and for only a few brief years thereafter.

As Garance Franke-Ruta at TAPPED notes, puberty in the human female begins at about age 9 and continues until about age 16. Ick.

Now, I will do Derbyshire a courtesy which Franke-Ruta does not (probably because he doesn't deserve it), and add context by quoting the paragraph which follows the one quoted above:
***Civilized*** male conservatives, among whose number I very much hope to be counted, regard the visual attractiveness of women as a welcome lagniappe in the grand scheme of things, other attributes being far more important practically all the time, and those other attributes being the grounds for our respect.

So, there you have it, girls - Derbyshire is a civilized male conservative, which means (in his mind) that, although he will no longer find you attractive after you've reached the age of consent, he will compensate for your loss by respecting you. Sweet deal, no?

But maybe ol' Derb is just confused about what "at, or shortly after, puberty" means. Maybe he thinks that he's describing women at least in their 20's - right? Wrong. The TAPPED post also points to this column, in which Harry Dean Stanton's evil twin waxes prosaic about that old maid Jennifer Aniston and her saggy breasts, and does the math for us:
While I have no doubt that Ms. Aniston is a paragon of charm, wit, and intelligence, she is also 36 years old. Even with the strenuous body-hardening exercise routines now compulsory for movie stars, at age 36 the forces of nature have won out over the view-worthiness of the unsupported female bust.

It is, in fact, a sad truth about human life that beyond our salad days, very few of us are interesting to look at in the buff. Added to that sadness is the very unfair truth that a woman's salad days are shorter than a man's — really, in this precise context, only from about 15 to 20.

I mention all this only because I want to invite the reader to perform a little thought experiment - suppose that some well-known liberal pundit like Paul Krugman, say, or (shudder) Michael Moore, admitted in print that he was attracted to 15-year-old girls. How long do you suppose it would be before the mob showed up with torches and pitchforks? But remember the fundamental rule: It's OK, if you're a Republican.

Update: Matt Yglesias says:
For the record, nobody should mention John Derbyshire being weird without linking to this photo and the accompanying explanation that "This is the only photograph taken on our wedding day."

Go ahead - click through, and tell me that you're not even more creeped out than you already were.




Ewwwww. I was only midly disgusted by this story (reported on other liberal blogs) until i clicked thru your link to the wedding photo. The faux sailor suit she's wearing really gave me the creeps when I stopped to think about it. [shudder]

Several hours until i can take a shower or drink myself into unconsiousness, so thanks a bunch!

Never trust anybody who
1. Doesn't have snow
2. Likes NASCAR
3. Fails to appreciate the voluptuous curves of an older woman.
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